I love children, but since my closest friends have had them, they have dropped off the radar and moved into another place in their lives. I like to hang out with the girls from time to time and have coffee, gossip and natter about random things, and I don't get the same thing any more.
Mothers of small children can't drop things for spontaneous coffee or going out to the movies. (Well, not the ones I am friends with.) Their lives have changed focus, and thus the conversation will often drift to the topic of what little Johnny's sleep schedule is like, ear infections (I MUST be interested, as I'm a medical student, right?), and the inevitable question of when I'm going to pop out a sprog or two. To be blunt, I just don't find this kind of conversation fun. I probably will when I have kids of my own, and these friends have been through it all years before me and are now fonts of practical knowledge and reassurance.
I have some work-friends who are mothers and who are able to talk about things that are non-baby-related. Their children are a little older, and they work a lot. They can gossip, go shopping, have lives, and still be interested in their families and be balanced people. This reassures me about working when I have children. I'm not the kind of person whose whole world could centre on being at home with baby. I need more.
I understand why my friends are so wrapped up in their kids and I'm glad they are enjoying this fleeting time in the lives of their little ones. However, right now I desperately need some socialising, particularly with people who don't spend the entire time talking about babies or medical matters.
This is one of my plans/hopes for this year.